The Real Man

Providing a concise answer to my earlier question of what makes a real man is a big quest but one that is badly needed. Men have always defined their manhood by their roles; the function they perform for their families and society. But the fundamental nature, the essence of man can only be perceived from three perspectives- priority, position and assignment.

Man was not created first because he is better but because of his purpose. God wanted him to manifest his nature and to be responsible for all that he created and asked to take care of. Man came directly from the earth because he was designed to be a solid and dependable foundation of human family.

The man was not only designed to be the foundation but also the first to be positioned on earth and of course in the garden- a place of heaven on earth, a place of God’s continued presence and a place of training. A phenomenon God wanted him to replicate or spread all over the world.

And lastly, his assignment. The man is supposed to be a visionary and a leader, teacher, cultivator, provider and protector.

He is not supposed to look up to status and personal achievement as the measure of manhood but rather to look up to God’s standard.

To be a real man is to discover, understand and fulfil these basic aspects of purpose.

The Crisis Called Man

If we are looking at the issue of war, battered wife, abandoned home, prostitution, armed robbery and so many other vices, you are primarily looking at the by product of the crisis that has enveloped man, most especially, the modern man. He seems to be loosing grip on a whole lot of things and it worsens his situation with each passing moment. He can not come to terms with the fact that he was supposed to be the bread winner but not any more as women are getting richer every day and becoming providers. How can he shout at his wife/girlfriend or even protect her when she either packs a .45 or Jet Li's around as a black belter. His crisis is that those things that he used in measuring and asserting his manhood like providing for a woman, protecting her, leading her spiritually, economically and politically are gradually being taken away from him and he no longer knows what it means to be a MAN! This is going to be a whole lot of a discourse but before i go further, i will like you good people to give me your take on what it means or takes to be a MAN. Then, i shall continue.

How Much Money Do I Want

In order to carry out our daily required activities, buy a gift for a lover, feed, buy a car, build that dream house and marry that beautiiful woman that has always been there in all my fantasies and so many other things, we need money. And lots of it i may add but then, how much would be enough for me. I often ask myself that question and would usually not arrive at an honest answer. But would i sound greedy to say that what readily comes to my mind is that all i want is a little more money than i can ever get?

Classy Way Of Doing It

They come in different shapes and sizes. Did i mention that they also come in varied lovely colours? Oh yes they do and many people love them too. The problem is not about the above attributes but how it is done. I don’t think anybody will raise an eye brow how you do it in private but in public, that’s another kettle of fish.
Hold on people, before your minds start going to places i’ve not dreamt of, i am only talking about chewing gums. Is there any classy and acceptable way of doing or rather chewing them in private and in public?

I Have A Dream Too

The unprecedented political turn out of events in the US has kept every tongue busy in all corners of the world and each people drawing a lesson or two from it. And i hope that Nigeria and indeed the whole of Africa will not be left out in this lesson that i see in the bigger picture. A picture that my mind has kept nagging me about and in my bid to escape it, i fell asleep and i still dreamt about it.

If eulogies were to be quantified, there will be none left in Nigeria as all have been exported to Obamaland but i resolved to capitulate to my mind’s push and desperately search for more eulogies because i need to export some to Clintonland and Palinshire

My mind was nagging about it because true to the nature of the African man and in particular, the Nigerian man, he has conveniently relegated the exploits of these two women to a deep abyss of a background. “Why?”, “Shebi make dem start their own for Naija” He would retort.

But on the contrary, i have a dream that one day, the strength and industrious nature of the African woman will be celebrated.

I have a dream that one day, we would respect the wish of African women to be treated with dignity.

I have a dream that we would put a stop to all the troubles we put the African women through politically and otherwise, all in the name of being men?

I have a dream that one day, a woman will be the president of my native land- Nigeria.

I may neither be Luther nor King, but i am Martin enough to dream and that’s the bigger picture.

Ultimately, i salute the resilience, tenacity, doggedness and innate love of the African woman. I am proud of her.

Obama Vs The Nigerian

I love the Nigerian spirit; the spirit to identify with and appreciate good things and good tidings. Such has been exhibited in all nooks and crannies of Naija as Barack Obama became the first black and the youngest president of the US. It was unbelievable but it happened through the tenacity of purpose, dream and doggedness of this young man. I’ve heard calls for us to replicate the Obama phenomenon in Nigeria. To believe in our dreams and make them happen. How can we do this when we don’t even have a Martin Luther King? The Nnamdi Azikiwe that we had has had his ideals buried and reburied because they do not have room for personal aggrandizement but rather, to build a better indivisible Nigeria and the rest that tried to Martin Luther us to greater heights had their voices shut before they became clarion calls. We shouldn’t judge Nigerians too hard especially, the younger ones. Obama has made history; there is no doubt about that but nobody has really made mention of the fact that he grew up in a society that has met the BASIC NEEDS of her citizens, a society that prepared and equipped him for this epic battle, a society that doesn’t expect to be praised for providing BASIC INFRASTRUCTURE like road and electricity, a society that respects the socio-political aspiration and rights of her younger generation and women and it wasn’t out of the ordinary for them that Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin- a state governor made their marks as presidential and vice presidential contenders respectively. Our first female governor via a miscarriage of law was celebrated for God sakes! Young Nigerians dream and they dare. That's the reason you have not experienced total anarchy in our beloved country. They are taking chances that are not allowed them and they are surviving. I never knew we were even ready for a Speaker as young as Bankole. We will continue to dare and we will also make history: that's the soul song of the Nigerian youth. 

As we call for our people to emulate the Obamamania, our government should also see his society and circumstances such as quality education, provision of basic infrastructure and the likes, a situation worthy of replication in Naija.

Height Of Falling In Love

I once heard that if you are not ready to catch someone, don't allow him or her to fall in love with you. I have also heard people say how often they have fallen in and out of love. And I believe that you have also heard it several times and might have even experienced it one way or the other. There is no gainsaying the fact, nay we all have to agree that "falling" happens from a height and I am forced to ask, from what height does one "fall" in love?

Emeka Amakeze writes 

The Soul of Ndi Igbo

How a people think is deadlier than what they think; and such has become the circumstance of the modern day Ndi Igbo.

“Egbe bere Ugo bere, nke si ibe ya ebena, nku kwaa ya”,

“Ọ baara isi, ọ bara agụba”

The above are wise sayings that used to be integral parts of the supplications of Ndi Igbo to Chi okike from their first encounter with the sunrise till the sun sets. But sadly, proclaiming that both the eagle and the hawk should perch; while the one that says the other should not perch should have its wings broken in bits, and that what is good for the goose is also good for the gander have all become the proverbial cloth that was swept off by the wind when Okoro; who was yet to become an odogwu tied it around his waist. Ọ were bụrụ ego emekwara mmọnwụ for one does not request a refund of the money sprayed on a masquerade.

A lot of water has passed under the bridge and how Ndi Igbo think has now become different from what it used to be mgbe ezi ka di n’ukwu ukwa. In the days when they recounted their heroic deeds, myths and legends in the presence of the moonlight and often times with children seated in semi circles while Ani - the earth goddess that does not spare evil doers witnessed. In the days when elders were respected for their wisdom and for those things that they saw while seated which the youthful age could not see even from the top of the Iroko tree, rather than feared because of the number of people they diabolically and jealously sent to the world beyond.

A ka na-agba ọsọ ọchụ? Gone are the days when elders cleared their throat to speak and the spirits listened.  Elders of Igbo land have learnt to fly without perching by killing the ones that call them father and the spirits learnt to shoot without aiming by looking the other way as elders are served pounded mbana instead yam. Ụmụaka were na-eresịzị ndi okenye adaka na ọnụ enwe.

The few wise ones still weep for the days when women were won by those who deserved them and the men, by the valour of their strength. The winds have swept away the days when elders, ndi diokpara and ndi ada were given their due respect irrespective of their financial status.

The water that passed under the bridge washed away the days when begging and stealing were considered abomination by Ndi Igbo; because one of the ways they measured their self worth was how hard they worked and how well fed their families were considered to be. Those were the days the Ndi Igbo believed that one’s neighbour was one's sibling; and that righteousness and purity were essential in his day to day activities. Those were the days they thought positively and it worked for them

It is no longer thus. Mmadụ ọ nọkwa n'ụlọ egbe were buru mbe?

But the child that says that his mother will not sleep will of course have no sleep.

Ndi Igbo man murdered sleep when they sacrificed their essence on the altar of self-importance and vainly chose to call themselves ọ kwụ ọtọ ekene eze and taught their children that wealth rather than truth and justice, is the final arbiter; akụ na-ebi okwu, ụmụazi were iwe bọsaa okpesi.

The vanity of Ndi Igbo and largely, how they now think has become a knife that has severed the thing that spiritually held him together, o wee buru oke n’ụlọ, ngwere n’ọhia. The soul of Ndi Igbo man left them and they fell apart.

But until Ndi Igbo agree that their mother will sleep by changing the way they think, they will continue to be denied sleep.

Emeka Amakeze writes...